Ever since I was negative two years old, it's been my dream to have my own video game. And on the packaging for that video game, there would be a big yellow burst that would say "END BOSS FEATURE!" like all the great games from when I was a kid. Making a selling point out of one of the most basic elements of a video game is maybe the best marketing I've ever heard of.

But why stop at end bosses? There's no reason not to play up "JUMP BUTTON" or "PAUSE GAME FEATURE" or even "GRAPHICS HAVE!"

I would hereby like to suggest that Telltale start marketing all its games as utilizing the cutting edge GRAPHICS HAVE feature we've all been reading about.

And I think my game should come with little foil stickers that say GRAPHICS HAVE that you can stick on your eyeballs while you play the game to remind you of the graphics it has since you won't be able to see them since you'll have stickers on your eyes you dumb moron.